


Bite Me

by EreshkigalIrkalla



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-21
Updated: 2014-12-21
Packaged: 2018-03-02 14:26:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 487
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2815388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EreshkigalIrkalla/pseuds/EreshkigalIrkalla
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There are some things that are better left unsaid.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bite Me

It sounds remarkably like a choking parrot.

Ronald has no idea where the sound is coming from, or indeed what could be making it, but he has to seek it out if for no other reason than he now has the colourful image of a choking parrot lodged in his head.

It turns out to be Sutcliff, of course, sitting at a desk in an empty office.

The lights are off, but Ronld can just make out Grell’s red and white striped ribbon pooled limply on the desk in front of him. He’s got the collar of his shirt pulled down with one hand, holding a hand mirror in the other, angling it left and right as though he’s trying to get a good look at the exposed skin.

“Let me see your neck, he says.” Grell mutters to no one in particular. “And I actually did. What a _brute _.”__

__“Mornin’ Senior!”_ _

__Grell makes another noise more suited to a distressed member of the animal kingdom than a person. The mother-of-pearl hand mirror falls to the desk with a loud clatter as Grell quickly pulls the collar of his shirt back up, wincing and letting out a cry of “Ow!” as he does so._ _

__“Are you alright?”_ _

__“Me? Fine.” He winces again._ _

__“Really?”_ _

__He receives a glare that could freeze hot coffee._ _

__“Absolutely fine.”_ _

__“Really? Then why’ve you got your neck all covered up?”_ _

__More wincing. “Just a little injury, that’s all.”_ _

__“Will you let me see?”_ _

__“No!”_ _

__“Oh, come on.”_ _

__Grell sighs theatrically (Then again, that’s the way Grell does everything). “Fine”. He pulls down his collar and Ronald actually gasps._ _

__The left side of his neck looks like it’s rotting, all black and red and uneven. And it’s oozing something, something dark green and liquid. It’s absolutely disgusting. Peering closer, he can just make out the indentations from what look like rows of sharp, needle-like teeth._ _

__“What in the hell happened to you?”_ _

__“Oh, it’s nothing, really. Should clear up in a few days. Gah!” Grell winces and makes a high-pitched noise like a startled bird._ _

__“What is that? I’ve never seen anything like it!” He leans in to get a better look, then thinks better of it when Sutcliff all but growls at him._ _

__“Sorry. How’d you get it?”_ _

__He looks down as Grell’s hand hovers in the air inches away from his blackened neck, and Ronald has the distinct impression that he is observing the outcome of an intense psychological battle as his senior tries desperately not to touch his newly acquired wound._ _

__“I’d… Rather not go into that, but here’s a tip Ronnie, from your loving senior to you.”_ _

__Ronald waits expectantly as Grell carefully pulls his collar back up, retying the ribbon as loosely as possible as he gets up to leave, red hair swishing from side to side as he walks away._ _

__“Don’t ever say “bite me” to a demon.”_ _

**Author's Note:**

> Sebastian! Don’t put that in your mouth, you don’t know where it’s been!
> 
> Alright so “bite me” didn’t actually come into use until after the 1940s, but the joke was too good to pass up. Just pretend that this altercation happened around then, or that the Reapers are several decades ahead both linguistically as well as technology-wise.
> 
> Also, “bite me” is not very lady-like, Grell. It’s no wonder you got in trouble.
> 
> I have no idea what Grell's canonical gender actually is, but since this is from Ronald's point of view, I went with "he".


End file.
